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51 Funny Car Jokes to Fuel Your Next Trip

Are you planning the next road trip with the kids? You already know how long and boring it can be if you are not prepared well. 

Those ‘are we there yet? Sometimes get so annoying, and it can get harder to keep your kids entertained.

What better way to make these car rides fun than telling car jokes? 

We have gathered the best car jokes that will keep your kids busy for hours!

car jokes

Funny Car Jokes

1. Did you read about the scientist who bred a Mustang with an elephant? 

Now he’s got a convertible with a giant trunk.

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2. Why did the snail paint a big “S” on his car’s hood? 

Because he wanted people to shout, “Look at that S-car go!” when he drove past.

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3. Did you hear what Sir Mix-A-Lot named his car? 

Anna Honda.

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4. When Jimi Hendrix was 16, he was in a car crash. 

Luckily it was just a Fender bender.

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5. Did you hear the University of Phoenix offers a program for used car salespeople? 

Now you can major in car-deal-ology.

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6. What happens when Kermit the Frog’s car breaks down?

 It gets toad.

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7. I had a nightmare last night that someone hit me with a car muffler.

 I woke up exhausted.

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8. Why is Miss Piggy such a bad driver? 

Because all she does is hog the road.

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9. What do you call a vampire who has the power to lift a car? 

Count Jackula

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10. What kind of vehicle does a chicken drive? 

A coop.

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11. An ice cream truck almost crushed me today. 

I was udderly terrified.

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12. Why can’t motorcycles do push-ups? 

Because they’re always two-tired.

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13. Rumor has it that Dyson is going to develop an electric car by 2025. 

I bet it’ll really suck.

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14. Kids, I bought the cat a new car. 

It’s a Cat-illac.

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15. What happens to cars when they turn 13 years old? 

They have a car-mitzvah.

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16. What type of car does the dog hate? 

A Cor-Vet.

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17. I need to get my car fixed. 

What body shop to you wreck-amend?

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18. If Yoda owned a business, I bet it’d be a…Toy Yoda Dealership.

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19. An electric car hit a cyclist the other day. 

It got arrested for assault with battery.

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20. Did you know that Teslas come with a unique “new car” smell? 

They call it “Elon Musk.”

car puns

Best Car Jokes and Puns

21. What kind of vehicle does an egg drive? 

A Yolks-wagen.

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22. I heard Gordon Ramsey drives a cool car.

 Must be a Chef-rolet.

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23. You know what really grinds my gears? 

Clutch failure.

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24. What’s got four wheels and flies?

 A garbage truck.

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25. Did you hear Kansas City has a new drive-through Greek restaurant? 

It’s called Lamb-Burger-ini.

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26. I accidentally drove my Subaru Outback into the river. 

Now it’s a Scuba-ru.

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27. I got gas for $1.99 at lunch. 

Unfortunately, it was from Taco Bell.

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28. What did the traffic light say to the car? 

“Turn your head while I’m changing!”

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29. I wanted to buy a new electric car. 

Their prices are just too shocking.

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30. Uncle Buck lost his left arm and leg in a terrible car accident. 

He’s all right now.

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31. What do you get when you crash a cement truck into a bus full of convicts? 

A bunch of hardened criminals.

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32. Where do canines park their cars?

 In the barking lot.

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33. Did you hear about the kidnapping at the DMV? 

Don’t worry. He woke up in time to take his driving test.

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34. My wife said I’d never been able to afford a car by selling Chef Boyardee.

 You should have seen her expression when I drove pasta.

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35. What’s the best pickup line? 

Probably Chevy’s.

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36. What has 10 letters and starts with G-A-S? 

Automobile.

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37. Why did the cop pull over the U-Haul truck?

 He wanted to bust a move.

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38. What kind of vehicle does Skeletor drive? 

A Zam-bone-i.

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39. My side mirror busted, so I taped a Hall and Oates album on it.

 Now I can get CD cars in my blind spot.

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40. Two French cheese trucks just crashed!

 It looks like there’s da’ brie everywhere.

best car jokes

Dad Car Jokes

41. When I was a kid, your Uncle John used to put me in a tire and roll me down a hill. 

Ah, those were the Goodyears.

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42. My car’s favorite meal of the day is…Brake-fast.

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43. I ordered that new auto part for you. 

It’s Honda way.

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44. Why did the washing machine schedule a test drive? 

Because it wanted to go for a spin.

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45. If I owned a DeLorean…I’d probably only drive it from time to time.

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46. What’s worse than raining cats and dogs? 

Hailing taxis.

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47. Wish I could park my dead car in the garage. 

Too bad there’s not enough vroom.

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48. Did you know all cars have snakes? 

They’re called windshield vipers.

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49. You should get a job at a transmission repair shop. 

I’m sure you’ll get used to the early-morning shifts.

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50. When is a vehicle not a vehicle? 

Once it turns into a driveway.

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51. Did you know it’s against the law to own an electric vehicle in Africa?

 They only allow Mada-Gas-Cars.

Your Turn!

We hope that you have enjoyed our car jokes! 

Which car jokes will you be using in your next road trip? 

Let us know in the comments below.

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