We all have our ups and downs, but the only thing that matters is how we cut across different circumstances.
We are here to take you through a detailed guide on how to strengthen your self-belief and respect yourself.
If you have ever wondered why you feel insecure at times and how to overcome that, stay with us until the end.
Let’s get started!
What is self-belief?
Before we start talking about what you can do to respect yourself more, you need to know what self-belief is in the first place.
A scientific definition by the famous psychologist Albert Bandura says that self-belief (or self-efficacy) is our belief that we have the ability to complete our tasks and accomplish our goals. Put simply – it is the belief we have in ourselves to succeed.
It would be good to throw light on the phrase our belief.
We can easily notice that it starts with us and has absolutely nothing with the rest of the world.
And here comes the best part – that is a favorable circumstance!
The only person you can change, work on, and the only human being who will always be by your side is yourself.
How to recognize the lack of self-belief?
Of course, life is not ideal, and each of us struggles with a giant list of different things every day. Developing a strong self-belief and learning how to respect yourself are very common things on that list.
Let’s mention several situations each of us has experienced at some point and which come as a result of low self-belief:
- You don’t face tough situations directly. Being scared of difficulties and problems is normal and acceptable. Regularly avoiding them is not. It shows that you don’t trust yourself enough to deal with complicated issues.
- You always give preference to other people. People-pleasing is a big sign that you have issues with self-esteem and self-belief. Putting yourself first is important, despite what you may think.
- You do your best to avoid socializing. Lack of social skills or lack of respect for yourself may be the reasons you feel socially inept.
- You often feel anxious. Now, we are not saying that the cure to all anxiety is believing in yourself. However, it will help you with a lot of everyday situations. For example, look at currently predominant online communications. If you struggle with communicating via video calls and online meetings, don’t miss our post on dealing with Zoom anxiety.
- You are thin-skinned. This is especially a problem if you are overly sensitive when it comes to critique directed at you.
- You are not motivated to do anything. While there may be many reasons you feel under the weather, lack of self-belief may be why you don’t feel like a proactive person. You are probably too afraid you will fail at everything you try.
- You show a lack of interest in pretty much everything. Most people have hobbies, interests, their social circles. Not feeling interested in any of that may be a sign similar to the point directly above.
How to Respect Yourself – 7 Key Tips
Now that we know how a lack of self-belief manifests, we can move on to the specific methods that can help you overcome it and respect yourself.
#1 – Become self-aware.
Working on yourself every day and improving in every aspect is an incredible trait. But it also can be very dangerous.
Pushing yourself above your abilities may drive you to frustration and make you think you are not good enough or you can’t do anything.
What a shame it would be to limit yourself like that!
It takes time, effort, and consistency.
The fact is you have to get to know yourself and be sincere. Realize what you are good at, where you have an open path to learn, improve your skills, and be ready to make the most of it.
Also, be very realistic on what is not your cup of tea and skip a bunch of annoyances, tears, and wasting time on things that don’t match your incredibleness.
Bonus Tip #1
If you are dealing with negative thoughts about yourself, write them down.
You could ask yourself a question that is bothering you and then try to answer based on facts, not your current opinion.
You will see that your negative beliefs, in most cases, are not true.
Bonus Tip #2
Write everything you are good at!
Next time you feel low or start doubting yourself, just read all those things as a quick reminder.
Positive dialogue with yourself is an extremely important part of strengthening your self-belief. Repeating makes you believe in something, so why not tell yourself “I can do this” instead of “I am not good enough”?
#2 – Don’t compare yourself with others.
Everyone strives to show the best part of themselves. You see all those Instagram pictures, funny stories, amazing videos, a bunch of friends having fun, but keep in mind – not everything is as it seems.
You never know what’s behind that smile or if that person is facing something you would never want to.
Comparing yourself with others can’t bring much good if it burdens you.
It is good to have someone who will inspire you or be an example that it is possible to achieve your dream from childhood, to show you how you can do something. But always adapt their advice to yourself – you are not the same people even if you have the same goals.
Be grateful for what you have, focus on your growth, work on your projects and see how your self-belief increases when you accomplish the goals you set out for yourself.
As Thomas Carlyle said:
Nothing builds self-esteem and self-confidence like accomplishment.
#3 – Feel free to take a break.
Don’t underestimate the importance of finding time to charge your batteries.
Being under pressure all the time may be a killer for your self-respect. Feeling like you are chasing something and never reaching it may make you think you are not good enough or cannot do it.
But the truth is – you just need a break!
Take some time to enjoy the little things you love. It will reduce your stress levels, and you will avoid damaging your confidence by feeling tired or socially distanced.
It’s up to you what you will choose – meditate, go on a massage, play sports, go to the gym, sing or dance.
It doesn’t matter. The only important thing is that it works for you and you feel happy after doing it.
See how far you have come and what’s left to do until you accomplish your goal. When you feel ready, continue your journey.
#4 – Create your perfect social circle.
You have heard many times that you are what you read, watch, eat, and similarly.
But what most defines you is with whom you spend your time.
Not all our acquaintances are wonderful, selfless, successful, and fun individuals who we adore spending time with every day.
Most likely, none of them are all that.
The truth is – we meet many people who have temporary roles in our lives. We also meet many people who are bad for our mental health. We meet people we don’t get along with, but we have to spend time with them.
However, that doesn’t solely bring bad things.
This social opportunity is a great way to find out what you need from people and realize who you want to keep in your social circle.
Distance yourself from people who make you think you are always wrong, who think you aren’t valuable, or people who are letting you down constantly.
Filtering through your circle of friends can be tricky at the beginning.
Still, when you cut all those toxic people from your life, you will feel incredible relief. It will feel like you started breathing again.
Choose those who make you feel good, who are supportive, and help you become the best version of yourself.
#5 – Challenge yourself in something new.
Our brain needs training just like our body, and it’s good at learning new things.
The more skills or stuff you learn, the better you become at learning and finding what you are passionate about.
Empowering yourself with knowledge, in general, is one of the most effective ways of empowering your self-belief.
Remember that to-do wish list you concealed because you didn’t feel ready enough to realize it? The good thing is you don’t have to prepare yourself extensively.
You just have to start doing.
Through the process, you will become ready and respond to all the challenges in a way you couldn’t imagine before. The key is to start and indulge in the art of challenge.
You will be surprised how good you can actually be, which will boost your self-respect right away!
#6 – Be someone’s strength.
It’s unbelievable how much self-belief increases when you do selfless things.
You can direct your generous deeds towards a friend, family member, companion from your school or work, or, after all, someone you don’t know.
You could do various things for them:
- Be their emotional support. Listen, understand, and offer advice when asked to do so.
- Help them with a problem they may be struggling with (if you know how to).
- Smile more. Brightening their day is that easy!
- Give them an honest compliment.
- Donate to a charity of your choice.
You could also do anything you feel would benefit someone else.
People often need someone who wants to listen to them, understand, and help them regain that little piece of confidence they lost at the moment.
By helping other people with their life puzzles, you will also build your own without anyone (including you) realizing it directly.
Next time, just do that small shift and see how someone else feels better, thanks to you. You will feel immediately feel happy about them and better about yourself, you superhero!
#7 – Learn to say ‘no’.
People with low self-belief struggle when it comes to standing up for themselves or say no.
Often we do things just because someone asked us, even if we don’t want to.
That makes us frustrated, sad and we lose the will to do anything good for ourselves. We overfill our schedule and make it harder to manage.
At the same time, this can increase stress and hamper us from working on our goals.
Sometimes acting like you are completely confident while saying ‘no’ can help you improve your self-belief. It can also show other people that you respect yourself deeply.
When you see the results and understand how good it feels to act like that regularly, it will motivate you to repeat this exact behavior in every uncomfortable situation.
Don’t forget what we said initially – the only person who will be by your side forever is you.
So, be gentle with yourself. Learn how to say ‘no’. Take care of your needs and put yourself first; no one can do it for you.
Bonus Tip – Give yourself a quick boost.
Most of the things on our list require a lot of hard work, and it takes quite some time to see the changes. You could expect that since great things require effort and consistency.
However, is there a way to give yourself a quick little boost when it isn’t your best day?
Yes, there are many! However, our personal favorite is watching good movies with inspiring and uplifting stories.
You know the kind we are talking about – the ones that make you feel good about yourself and your chances in the world.
If you are not sure which movie you could watch to boost your self-belief, we will help you with our shortlist:
- The Devil Wears Prada (2006)
- Forest Gump (1994)
- Beyond the Lights (2014)
- A League of Their Own (1992)
- We Bought a Zoo (2011)
- The Pursuit of Happiness (2006)
- Begin Again (2013)
- Under the Tuscan Sun (2013)
Sometimes feeling good for those couple of hours and watching an inspiring story unravel in front of you can turn your day around!
Quick fixes don’t do the trick as a good long-term solution, though. Working on your self-belief is a lifetime process.
Change can’t come overnight, but the most important thing is to be conscious of what you have to work on and make small steps every day.
If you found our advice useful, please let us know in the comments down below!